Do you think you need to be someone different?

As much as I love the way social media connects me with people, I find myself questioning again and again, how I want it to be a part of my life. When does it serve me, and when does it drain me? I’ve found it to be quite an effective space to practice mindfulness. I observe the thoughts that arise when I see a photo, I observe the emotions triggered by reading a post, I notice my general state; do I feel more energized and inspired or heavy and drained? Whenever I catch myself feeling heavy and drained, I switch it off. I haven’t found the magical balance yet, and I wonder if that is really possible, or if the real way to stay in my power is through the practice of mindful media engagement. I’m not sure yet. 

One thing I’ve noticed is how much social media can trigger comparison. Seeing others and what they do make me question who I am, what I’m doing and whether I should do it differently? If I should be someone different? And that's when it gets dangerous. I’ve found this thought pattern to be the most toxic I can enter. Believing I should be someone different in order to belong in the world. Because hey, if we believe there is something fundamentally wrong with us, or that we need to change completely, then we’re basically at war with ourselves.

My own journey has been a lot about releasing the ideas of what I ought to be. Shedding the ‘shoulds’, stop trying to pretend and letting others do their thing by allowing myself to do my thing. 

Playing with reflections. Photo by Amelie Vignaud

Playing with reflections. Photo by Amelie Vignaud

When I was reading this poem it felt as taking a long deep breath and realizing you’ve been tensing the whole body.

You who hold tenderly the journey
the breath of life
You who hold passion and joy
the fire of life
You who hold hands with a little child
learn to follow that child
You who wander with no purpose
enjoy firefly moments
hike to clear waterfalls
until your inner knowing
forms a path for
your feet
You who teach, wise ones,
so full of life
having lived well
willing to guide
remember to continue
 on your own journey
You may turn your back to others

We see the light you follow
blazing around you
and go to seek our own

―Janice Becker Haynes

I wonder what that poem made you feel? I’d love to hear, just let me know in the comments below.

And in case you’ve forgotten (trust me, I still forget!) I thought I’d remind you of this:

You are complete just the way you are. 
You are enough.